The kid asking me what a bastard is.
I have this thing that I will answer and explain any question he asks me to the best of my ability. We've even talked about abortion. I remember being a kid, and I know if I don't tell him he'll ask someone else, another kid, and he won't get the correct impression. I started by making it clear that it was not a word he was allowed to say, it was a curse word, but kinda in the same line as crap- just a bit worse. I started to tell him that most curse words had origin elsewhere and were not originally a curse word, but meant something. That ass was a donkey, and that the f word actually means sex, but that they've been used over the years as something derogatory and not correctly anymore. Here is where he pointed out that I said the F word last time I hit my head on the futon armrest. *My kid, still cute.* Anyway, I told him 'bastard' was now the same thing as saying 'asshole' but meant more for only men, just less commonly used. Then I told him what it originally meant.
And then I watched it click for him.
He tells me "So since you and daddy weren't married that makes me that word?" I start to break down the technicalities of it all and tell him how back when it was commonly used couples were married before having kids, it was just how it was done and now it's just as common to not be married. That the word in it's proper use no longer carries the same stigma it used to, and in it's correct form really isn't an insult anymore. We talked about it for a while, and he seemed okay and not upset by the whole thing. I hope I read him right on this one.
One of the things I'm always iffy about with my parenting is my honesty with my kid. With the exception of Santa Claus, I refuse to lie to him. Even about issues like this. I tell him when I make mistakes, or when I'm out of line with things I do in life. We talk about life choices and I am nothing if not blunt with my child, but I always fully explain things, pros and cons. Yes, he's seven, and like I said- this is one of my parenting traits that I'm not always okay with. I just want him to know that he can always come to me for an answer, even the things that may not be comfortable topics. When I don't know something, I tell him I don't know. Then we google it.
He's on page 48 of HP1, or, at least he was before he went to bed to read for thirty minutes before lights out. He does things and says things sometimes that just make me stop what I'm doing and stare. I am amazed everyday by his growth, his intellect, and his ability to comprehend difficult concepts. He's also expressing his emotions vocally so well I want to point him out to his father sometimes and demand he learn a thing or fifteen. When I got pregnant I didn't think much past the point that I was carrying a child. I had no concept of raising one, caring for one, loving one. He is, by far, the best decision I ever made. I just hope that I'm making the right decisions for him now since he can't make a lot of them for himself.